CALawMama's Blog

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Experiences at the interface of life, law, and motherhood in Cali

Life: if you’re not happy, what’s the point?

I’ve been on a real kick about happiness and fulfillment of purpose lately. Perhaps it has some small bit to do with the fact that I write about tragic car accidents, nursing home abuse/negligence, and personal injury lawsuits for a living. Whatever the case, I can feel that life is precious.

I see it every single day when one of my kids falls and scrapes their knee or elbow. I think of it when I remember my friend’s daughter who fought hard and best leukemia at just 1 year old, or my other friend’s 6 week old who needed and received a heart transplant.

We are humans, we are subject to die at any moment. It may sound morbid, but it’s the truth. And until you fully embrace that fragility, you can’t life your life to your fullest potential. Once you embrace this basic truth, you can begin your real soul searching.

Every person has a calling. I’ve only recently realized that mine was to homeschool my children and write law blogs. I would have never in a million years guessed this trajectory.

When I was in law school, I was set on achieving all those milestones that ensure you get a big law job. I even landed a big law interview. Shit, I had two children during law school and still managed to graduated cum laude, served as a research assistant, and student editor. I did a mock trial and a moot court competition, both while I was pregnant. My plan was to have my kids during school so that it would be easier to focus on my career when I graduated, because I would have had that time with them, and they wouldn’t be in daycare as newborns.

And yet, putting my girls in daycare for 6 hours a day while I studied for the bar exam for 3 months felt like torture on a daily basis. I felt so guilty, and I missed them, and I wondered about what they were doing, all.day.long. Needless to say, it did not work. Something had to change.

So I decided I stay home with them until they were old enough for school. But sending my sweet girl away to the most amazing preschool ever still didn’t feel right. Then homeschool came into our lives, and I discovered my true calling. I never knew such happiness could be possible. Eventhough my children challenge me endlessssssly the special moments we spend together make me euphoric.

But that’s not the end of the story. As any homeschooling parent can tell you, finances can be challenging. Without the ability to work during the day, since you’re with your kids, how can you make income? I had blawged for fun, and even gotten a part time blawg job, but I was at a point where it wasn’t enough. Would I have to work full time to make things work? Then the perfect opportunity came along. It’s as though once I reached the decision about homeschooling, everything fell into place. And things have continued along that path since then.

On an almost final note, probably the most important thing you can do is yay true to yourself. Don’t go looking to others to define your success. Set your own goals and find your own happiness. Staying true to yourself is the key to authentic happiness.

While I haven’t had the chance to actually read the book, I’ve heard wonderful things about the power of positive thinking and optimism. I speak from personal experience when I tell you this is absolutely true. Escape from the cynicism and sarcasm, and see the good in things, build people up instead of putting them down, reflect on your character, and he universe will provide. Life is good babies. Let’s enjoy it while we can!

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Filed under: inspiration, , , , , ,

2 Responses

  1. Cathy Laws says:

    Are you a social worker? what you do for a living sounds similar to me, and when you’re constantly reminded of the bad in the world, living vicariously through clients and helping them, you have no choice but to think as optimistically as you possibly can🙂 Hang in there!

    • calawmama says:

      I’m a lawyer actually🙂 I just read about all the worst case scenarios and try to live life to the fullest I can. Thanks for the comment!🙂

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